This reminds me of my husband's family, and specifically what he is dealing with with his father at this very moment. It's hard for myself to know how to feel about him because my husband vacillates between having a close relationship with him one week and blocking his calls the next. The only thing I can do is support my husband, though - that's my job!

It's just a shame, being on the outside looking in on that tug-of-war between "this man is family" and "this man is a huge sore spot in our lives and marriage." I hope eventually we are able to reach a tenuous equilibrium like you have.